Sunday, November 28, 2021

Post No. 029: My First Gay Friend, Part 5 — Though (and) Still


(Image from Globe Views)

Though...

...I would never again look
so long, my friend—
for when being friends took
so long, my friend,
feeling that I had known you
so long, my friend,
carried me along through
'so long, my friend.'

Still...

...You have been cold for
so long, my friend, that
I can only endure
so long, my friend.
I have been 'dumb' for you
so long, my friend,
that before I am 'numb' too
so long, my friend.

-Paul Whiting
(a.k.a., A Creative Writer)
"I maybe say too much about how life really is!"

My Writing Notes:

The reason that I wrote this poem can be summed up with the following statement: I had a huge crush on my first gay friend Greg, but he already had a boyfriend! And I let go of Greg as a friend, because I felt like he wasn't good for me, which is why I wrote this poem but—more than likely—it was probably just me who was at fault!

You see, I had way too many expectations for what our relationship could be, since I had a huge crush on him—although he wasn't interested in me 'romantically.' And I imagine that is why Greg was so 'cold' to me, because he wasn't interested in me 'romantically,' but I still expected more from our relationship...even though I really shouldn't have.

Just so you know, I revised this poem, as I often do with my writing! And I changed how one line of this poem was written when I realized that I should remove the metaphorical comparisons to "deafness" and "blindness," since it is disrespectful toward those who are deaf or blind. So, I wanted to show you how this particular line used to be written, before I revised it as above.

And it used to be written like this:

I have been 'deaf' for you
so long, my friend,
that before I am 'blind' too
so long, my friend.

Thus, I revised this poem to be written as it is above.

And this poem was also published on my "Small All White in the Forest" blog (please see the hyperlink below for the blog), since I feel that the message in this poem applies to the message that I am trying to convey through "Small All White in the Forest."

This poem was written in Salt Lake City, Utah.

-Paulee

https://smallallwhiteintheforest.blogspot.com

This "Paul Whiting — A Creative Writer" Post No. 029 was edited on September 7th, 2023.

"Poetry is using the fewest words possible in order to describe all that is possible to describe." –Paul Whiting [June 1st, 2022]